Family Radio CHRI


Brandon & Siebe’s 5 Marriage Questions

brandon heathChristian artist, Brandon Heath & his wife Siebe have talked about 5 Questions that they use on a weekly basis to check in with one another. With 3 years of marriage under their belt, they've shared that  the number one lesson they've learned is to work on communication and these 5 weekly question help them getting talking and listening.

Here are the 5 questions:

1. How did you feel loved this past week?

-I love this question because it makes me look and take notice of the little things Brandon does for me. I really cherish those little moments and love holding on to them so I can tell Brandon when we sit down for our questions. I have also found that I am sometimes surprised by what Brandon says made him feel loved. I think this taps into the whole 5 love languages thing, because we feel love differently we sometimes don’t always realize what is making our spouse feel loved. This is also motivation to do things for your spouse, because you know this question is going to be asked.

2. What does your upcoming week look like?

-This is so nice to go over together. It gives you an idea of any big things or small things going on with your spouse. I laugh at this question though because I am the Type A person in our relationship and it’s usually me telling Brandon what his upcoming week looks like....ha.

3. How would you feel most loved and encouraged in the days ahead?

-This is just setting each other up well. Brandon and I always talk about trying to set each other up to win. Now believe me there have been times where Brandon said he’d love me to do something for him that week and I failed to get it done. This is where you have to give each other grace. It’s such a warm and fuzzy feeling though when you request something from your spouse and then they do it knowing that is what will make you feel loved. It can be super simple too. I am a words of affirmation girl so I usually tell Brandon if he wants to leave me a surprise post it somewhere then my heart will soar. It could also be something as simple as, would you mind going to the store for me.

4. How would you best feel pursued in intimacy this week?

-Aww, the sex question. Let’s be honest....this is a big part of our marriages. I think this question is great because this can be a hard topic to bring up. This just opens the door right up. It lets you communicate to your partner proactively instead of reactively about desires, wishes, needs.

5. How can I pray for you this week?

-This might be the most important of all of the questions. This question reminds us to keep Jesus at the center of our relationships. Isn’t it just a great feeling when you know someone is praying for you? It gives me a sense of peace about what I am stressing over. Your spouse knows more about you than anyone and this question allows you to talk about things you may not want to share with anyone else.

There are the questions! Although simple, I think they open the door to so many great things for your marriage. I don’t know where you are in your marriage. You may be over communicators or sweep it under the rug type people, but I would challenge you and your spouse to commit to trying it for one month. Just see if and how it helps your marriage. I’d love to know if you enjoyed the process or if you have other suggestions to working on your marriage. Marriage is not only important for you and your spouse but to everyone who witnesses your love for each other.



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