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Addressing the ‘Mental Load’ of Moms & Dads

The mental load of a parent is not often talked about and it is a common issue. One of the reasons it is likely not talked about is because of the selflessness that parents and guardians are portraying on a daily basis. This can often cause them to forget about their own wellbeing and can later affect things like marriage, happiness, and other relationships.

Here are four tips for you and/or your spouse if the mental load is becoming too much of a stress...

1. Be open to a conversation, not a venting session. Hear your spouse’s side to things, and let him or her share the mental load they have been carrying.

2. Identify any imbalances. There may be inequality in your relationship. Try to pinpoint specific areas where one person could use some relief.

3. Don’t just assign tasks as if one person is the employee and the other is the CEO. Divide duties by whole areas of life. For example, don’t just say, “You take the kids to soccer.” Let the other parent be in charge of soccer — buying the cleats, keeping track of the schedule, signing up for snack day, making sure the kid is up and dressed for games and practices. Let them take on both the task and the mental load.

4. Now here’s the trickiest part: Butt out. Once you give the other parent the responsibility for something, don’t micromanage. Let him or her take care of it even if they may not handle it exactly the way you would. My kids often go to soccer with Medusa hair and shockingly mismatched clothes, but that’s OK. It is off my mental load list, so it’s not mine to worry about anymore.

Read the full article here: www.deseretnews.com

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